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How to guarantee project failure?

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I know that my question is a bit weird, but I want to know what are the things that a project manager (or any other stakeholder) needs to do in order to guarantee project failure. I know of the following ways to guarantee the failure of any project:

- Not communicating with the stakeholders
- Not creating/updating the project plan
- Not paying attention to the client's needs

What are the other things that need to be done in order to guarantee project failure?
asked 9 years ago by anonymous

1 Answer

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Here are some ways to guarantee project failure:

1- Disrespect your team members: Treat your team members with disrespect and you will be guaranteed sloppy work, wrong code, and missed deadlines.

2- Don't answer your emails: Ignore all emails, especially from your client (those that contain some updates about the requirements). Create a rule in your email to direct all emails sent from your stakeholders to "Trash".

3- Don't use a project management methodology: Completely ignore all the work and research done to come up with a methodology to manage projects and come up with your own ad-hoc PM methodology that will evolve with the project.

4- Micromanage your team members: This will completely demotivate them and will reduce their thinking skills to near 0 and will increase their reliance on you to the maximum. For extra efficiency follow the point #5 below.

5- Be unavailable: Whether it's a phone call or a personal meeting, always pretend that you're too busy for being available. This will ensure that nobody can ask you anything about the project.

6- Don't monitor the work: Don't waste your time monitoring the tasks that your team members are currently working on. If you do you the project may "succeed" (which is the opposite that you want, right?)

7-  Don't control changes: Allow your client to add any features that he wants about the project without any change control. Change request forms should be your enemy.

8- Forget about politics: Ignore company politics and pretend that you live in a vacuum.
answered 9 years ago by MaplePM (46,940 points)

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